Good Days ad Bad Days
I have good days and bad. Most days this week I was able to rally myself to create. It’s like I need to ramp up the numbers of what I’m producing. I’ve made 132 accordion books of various sizes, fifteen 18” memory sticks, eight 4” memory sticks, and ninety-nine 3” memory sticks to place around the neighborhood.
On the good days, I can wrap and tie and cut and glue and find just the right combination. I can work on a jigsaw puzzle with bright colors – enjoying the intense concentration it takes to find and place the next piece. Evidently, I equate the good days with production.
Every drawer, every closet, even the pantry and the garage are organized to the nth degree. I’ve organized my address book, done the filing, and paid the bills.
I would prefer to equate good days with having a nice walk with the dogs, enjoying the sunshine, listening to the birds or creek or the rustle of the wind, turning up the music and dancing around the house. I want it not to matter when it takes weeks to finish a puzzle.
I don’t want bad days to be those days where I’ve eaten the wrong foods, judged myself, and found myself severely lacking. Thinking about the sheltering in place, how it’s easy for me, and life altering and devastating for so many others can turn a good day into bad. How much will I have to do to help others before I can feel like I’m doing enough?